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some more.
How do you make a Yugo go faster?
A towtruck.
What do you call the shock absorbers inside a Yugo?
Passengers.
Two guys in a Yugo were arrested last night in Oakland following a push-by shooting incident.
The new Yugo has an air bag. When you sense an impending accident, start pumping real fast.
A friend went to a dealer the other day and said, "I'd like a gas cap for my Yugo." The dealer replied, "Okay. Sounds like a fair trade."
I have also said for years that the car is named because "Yugo, but it doesn't".
How can you get a Yugo to do 60 miles an hour?
Push it over a cliff.
A man walks into an auto parts store and says, "I'll take a gas cap for a Yugo" "Sounds like a fair trade", says the couter worker.
Why do Yugo's have a heater for the back window?
To keep your hands warm when pushing.
Why don't Yugo's sustain much damage in a front-end collision?
The tow truck takes the impact.
How do you double the value of a Yugo?
Fill the tank!
What is found on the last two pages of every Yugo owner's manual?
The bus schedule.
What do you call a Yugo with a flat tire?
Totalled.
Q: How do you upgrade a Yugo car?
A: Put in an engine.
A. "TRADE IT FOR A TRABBIE" (the late great Roosian "people's car")
A. "PARK IT NEXT TO A PORTAJOHN.....AND LEAVE IT UNLOCKED"
A. "CRUSH IT AND USE IT FOR TRACTION BALLAST IN YOUR BIG DOG 4X4 PICKEMUP TRUCK"
Q: Why do Yugos have heated rear windows?
A: To keep your hands warm when you're pushing them.
Q: How do you make accelerate a Yugo from 0 to 100 km in 10 seconds?
Q. What's the difference between a Yugo and the principal's office?
A. It's less embarrassing if your friends see you leaving the principal's
office.
Q: What goes on pages 4-5 of the Yugo user's manual?
A: The train & bus schedule.
A man goes to a parts garage:
Man: "Can I have a windshield wiper for a Yugo please?"
Parts man: "Yeah, that seems like a fair swap."
Q: What is the sport-version of Yugo?
A: The driver wears Nike shoes.
Q: What do you call a Yugo at the top of a hill?
A: A miracle.
Q: What do you call two Yugos at the top of a hill?
A: A mirage.
Q: What do you call a Yugo with dual exhausts?
A: A wheelbarrow
Q: How do you double the value of a Yugo?
A: Half fill it with gasoline!
Q: How do you make a Yugo look good?
A: Park it between two Cadillacs!
Q: What to you call a Yugo with brakes?
A: Customized.
Q: What do you have to do if your Yugo gets in the way of a swarm of killer
bees?
A: Stop pushing and take refuge into the car.
Q: What is the Yugo owner's most ardent wish?
A: To buy a car.
Q: What do you call a Yugo with a seat belt?
A: A rucksack.
Q: How do you make a Yugo go faster uphill?
A: Throw out the passenger.
Q: How do you make a Yugo go faster downhill?
A: Turn off the engine.
Q: What do you call a Yugo with a flat tire?
A: A write off.
STOP PRESS!!
Yugo has announced a new 16 Valve model for 1993.
8 in the engine, 8 in the radio.
- I can see you've got a new car - a Yugo!
- Yes, I won the second prize in a lottery.
- What was the first prize then?
- A fruit-basket!
Yugo will be introducing three new vehicles next year. They will have a moped called an "I Go". They will have a
4-door called a "We Go". They will also have a new station wagon called the "Y'all Go".
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