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#1
04-23-2004, 09:29 AM
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Jokes - Car Names Explained
Acura
Automobile Causes Universal Road Accidents All Cars Usually Require Adjustment Any Child Understands Real Automobiles Americans Can Underestimate Routine Accidents Aston A Stupendous Ton of needles! Audi Accelerates Under Demonic Influence Always Unsafe Designs Implemented Beetle By Everyone's Experience, They Last Eternally! Battered Everywhere; Expect To Lose Engine BMW Babbling Mechanical Wench Beastly Monstrous Wonder Beautiful Masterpieces on Wheels Beautiful Mechanical Wonder Big Money Waste Big Money Works Born Moderately Wealthy Break My Windows Broken Money Waster Broken Monstrous Wonder Brutal Money Waster Bumbling Mechanical Wretch Big Money Waster Break My Window Busted My Wallet Buick Big Ugly Import Car Killer Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer Big Ugly Indestructible Compact Killer Camaro Can't America Make A Real One? Chevrolet Car Has Extensive Valve Rattle On Long Extended Trips Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time Clutch Hangs, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time Cracked Head Every Valve Rattles Oil Leaks Every Time Chevy Cheapest Heap Ever enVisioned Yet Chrysler Car Having Really Yucky Stupid Lazy Engine Runs Could Have Remained Your Sickly Lame Elderly Relative's Citroen Crummy Interior, Terrible Road-holding, Owned Entirely by Nebishes Dodge Dead Or Dying Garbage Emitter Drips Oil, Drops Grease, Everywhere Dem Old Dudes Go Everywhere Dangerous On Days Gears Engage Death Overcomes Driver's Generous Ego Damn Old Dirty Gas Eater Dukes Often Destroy Good Engines Fiat Failure in Automotive Technology Feeble Italian Attempt at Transportation Fix It Again Tony? Fix It All the Time Ford Fix Or Repair Daily Found On Road Dead Backwards... Driver Returns On Foot Backwards... Dorks Ride On Fords Factory Ordered Road Disaster Factory Ordered Rebuilt Dodge Flip Over Read Directions Four Old Rusted Doors Fixed On Race Day Ford Owner Really Dumb For Only Retarded Drivers Ford Owners Recommend Dodge Flipped Over Russian Dunebuggy Found On Russian Dump For Off Road Death it Freaking Only Runs Downhill Fat Old Rusted Dog Freaking Old Rusted Dodge(Datsun) Frigin Oakies Really Dig it Funky Old Road Dog Found On Roadside's Destroyed Backwards...Don't Ride Over Fifty Fixed-up Old Repossesed Dodge Found Old Rebuilt Dodge Forget OutRunning Dale Found On Railroad Deserted Found On Railroad Dead Fools Only Read Directions First On Repair Dolly Favorite Of Redneck Drivers Backwards- Dumb Retards Own Fords Funny Old Rebuilt Dodge Fast Only Rolling Downhill Found On Russian Dump Forfiet On Race Day Found On River Dead Failure Of Research & Development Ford LTD Found On Road Dying, Left To Die Geo Good Engineering Overlooked Gets Eventually Over 50 GMC Garage Man's Companion Generally Mediocre Cars Get More Chicks Got Mechanic Coming Generally Made Crappy Honda How Odd, No Damn Acceleration Hold Overs Not Doing Anything Hell Of a Nice Damn Automobile Had One, Never Did Again Hyundai Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive... Jaguar Junk Always Going Under At Repair Shop Jeep Junk Electrical and Emissions Parts Jump Excitedly in Every Pothole Junk Everyone Eyes for Parts Jinxed Engine has Extra Parts Jumps Everything Ever Parked JUST Enough Engine Power? Jr. Engineered Every Part Lotus Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious Mazda Model All Zoids Drive Aimlessly Making A Zillion Dollars Annually Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along Mercedes Most Every Red Cent Eventually Dissipates, Extinguishing Savings Mercury Mileage Eventually Ruins Car -- Usually Ruins You Makes Everyone Really Crave Underpowered, Recalled Yugo Makes Envisioning REAL Car Understandable -- Recalled Yet? Motorists Easily Rate Car (Usually "Real Yo-yo") MG Motoring Genius Mopar Most Often Passed At Races Mostly Old Parts And Rust Mostly Old Paint And Rust Mitsubishi's Over Priced American Replicas My Old Plymouth Ain't Runnin' Made Of Plastic And Rust Move Over Passing Another Rat Mustang Massively Under Siezed Tires And No Go Nissan Never In Synch Screeching Awful Noises Needs Imminent Salvage So Abandon Now Oldsmobile Oh Look, Dammit, Some Massive Oil Burning Idiot's Leaking Everything Old Loose Dented Sheet Metal Outdated By Infamies Like Edsel Old Ladies Driving Slow making Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everyday Old Ladies Drive Slow - Mostly Over Bridges Into Lake Erie Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover Equipment Pinto Put In New Transmission Often Put In Nickel To Operate Paid Inspector Nicely To Overlook Plymouth Please Let Your Mother Out Under The Hood! Police Laugh, Old Men Ogle, All Underestimating This Heap Pontiac Poor Old Nitwit Thinks Its A Cadilliac Pours Out Noxious Toxins In American Cities Porsche Puts Out Really Smoky Carbonate Hazardous Emissions Phased Out Racer-Still Can't Hold Engine Please Overlook Really Smutty Cardboard Horrible Engine Pulled Over Regularly So Cops Have Enough Proof Only Rich Suckers Can Have Everything Rabbit Replace A Beetle? Boy, It Tried Racy? Ain't! Bouncy, Bad Itty-bitty Toy! Renault Retarded Engine, No Acceleration, Ugly Lump of Trash Saab Swedish Automobile - Always Broken Send Another Automobile Back Sad Attempt At Beauty Sorry Auto Always Broken Sable Sleezy Auto Brakes Leak Everytime Toyota Taking Our Yen Out -- Thanks All Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto Towed Often, Yearly Overrunning Triple A Triumph The Risk Involving Useless Machinery Pays Heavily Trembling Ride, Intrusive Undercarriage, Meekly Powered Hotrod. This Really Is Unreliable Man, Please Help! Tried Repairing It Until My Parts Hurt Vanagon Via Another Name: A Go-cart On Nerve Volkswagen Vehicle Owner's List: Kite String, Wire, Aluminum, Gum, Engine (NOT!) Volvo Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object VW Very Worthless Virtually Worthless Tks to: Dodge by cls12vg30 and NoOne Lotus by jameswhintigton Mopar by NoOne Aston by Spastik Roach MG by ZerK Chevrolet by MrVette83
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·.·΄―`·.· DarkPhenix ·.·΄―`·.· ·.·΄―`·.· Underground Sounds of Lisbon ·.·΄―`·.· Last edited by DarkPhenix; 04-24-2004 at 04:19 AM. 
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#3
04-23-2004, 10:04 AM
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MATRA
My, All That Rust Already !!! ( to true to be really funny  )
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Voitures-Franηaises 'R' Nous ( そして日本語 ) und jetzt der neue Ringmeister "Thank god I am not -What-"
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#4
04-23-2004, 10:25 AM
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MG
Motoring Genius
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Cheers, -Ads "We used to come down, doing about 180mph. We take off over the bridge and change down to 4th gear in the air. Go through the righthander with the car drifting, and let it swing out through the lefthander and then slide out to the wall, where we simply stopped it with a flick of the wrists" -Vic Elford, on Maison Blanche in a Porsche 917 UCP's Most Hardcore Armchair BTCC Fan & Anthony Reid Supporter
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#5
04-23-2004, 10:29 AM
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tks zerk!
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·.·΄―`·.· DarkPhenix ·.·΄―`·.· ·.·΄―`·.· Underground Sounds of Lisbon ·.·΄―`·.·
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#6
04-23-2004, 10:32 AM
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Thought that one up in about 3 seconds
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Cheers, -Ads "We used to come down, doing about 180mph. We take off over the bridge and change down to 4th gear in the air. Go through the righthander with the car drifting, and let it swing out through the lefthander and then slide out to the wall, where we simply stopped it with a flick of the wrists" -Vic Elford, on Maison Blanche in a Porsche 917 UCP's Most Hardcore Armchair BTCC Fan & Anthony Reid Supporter
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#7
04-23-2004, 01:20 PM
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Addition to Chevrolet
Cracked Head Every Valve Rattles Oil Leaks Every Time
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2005 Victory Red Chevrolet Silverado Crew Cab 2002 Concord Purple Harley Sportster 883XLC "I think the Vietnam war is nothing more than the white people sending the black people to fight the yellow people in order to secure a nation stolen from the red people"-Anonymous UCP's Biggest Chevrolet Corvette fan.
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#9
04-23-2004, 03:25 PM
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dark phenix, you have WAY too much time on your hands! lol good post.
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"manatees have no compassion, they sacrifice all for the sea grass" - Clutch-Monkey
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#10
04-23-2004, 05:32 PM
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ASton
A Stupendous Ton of needles!
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Sand Ninjas - A subsidiary of BOJ "In the 21st century countries do not invade other countries" - John McCain
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#11
04-23-2004, 05:57 PM
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Dodge = Done Outta Damn Good Earnings
Mopar = Move Over Passing Another Rat (RAT being the nickname for Chevy big blocks)
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#12
04-23-2004, 06:00 PM
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You missed one of the most common (and truthful) ones,
LOTUS :- Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious!
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#13
04-24-2004, 04:33 AM
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Couple of Variations:
Proof Of Rich Spoilt Children Having Everything Hang On, Not Done Accelerating Shape Appears Ass Backwards Heap Of Low Down Engineered Nonsense Found It At Tip Operates Pitifully, Even Lingers Allows Users Driving Idiocy Creates Indescribable Trouble, Really Evil Old Nutter Neon Imitation. Strange, Stupid, Annoying, No-Way Seems Everyone Needs To Really Accelerate Sorry, my brain just forze............................................. ....................
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It is my solemn duty to inform you to please GTFO, and take your fail with you. Sauc3: I thought you were a large unattractive white woman... Shouldn't they be flocking to you?
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#14
04-24-2004, 02:47 PM
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Ford: Friends old Laser Died.
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Sand Ninjas - A subsidiary of BOJ "In the 21st century countries do not invade other countries" - John McCain
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#15
04-24-2004, 04:02 PM
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Tks to all by your sugestions!!
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·.·΄―`·.· DarkPhenix ·.·΄―`·.· ·.·΄―`·.· Underground Sounds of Lisbon ·.·΄―`·.·
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