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Well mate, this must be absolutely horrible for you. Luckily i have never been involved in any such situation. I hope you will decide the best option. There is nothing else I can do from this far away, except wishing you the best of luck right now and in the future. I hope she will recover quickly, I hope the doctors are able to save her.
Whatever may happen I wish you and your wife the best. I hope offcourse she may still witness 2007.
Best wishes,
Sjoerd.
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Hard to find any words who can comfort you in this hard and painful situation.
As mentioned earlier, I hope you can find strength to hang in there..
My heart goes to you and your wife...
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I can appreciate the difficulties.
I do think you need to remember your wife's request tho' - unless she changed it after initial ICU.
It's hard to let a loved one go. I held my dad's hand and told him how much I loved him as he gasped for air having agreed that their was to be no more intervention. Yes, it's hell BUT it is a release for the other person and after emergency room treatment every week for nearly 2 months he said he had had enough.
A few years earlier my mother was hospitalised for nearly 6 months on a slwo decline. I visited daily. I felt the loss worst when she passed as I said g'night and see you tomorrow and then had a phone call at 5am to say she had passed away without any of us there.
I feel for you as you consider your choices and wishes and prayers are with you and family.
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Thoughts and prays to you Doug and your family in this time of great sadness, hopefully things will improve for your wife. Your post has certainly made me have a think about the important things in life and how we get caught up in the minute things that dont actually matter.
My prays and thoughts are with you
Kind Regards
John
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Very sorry to hear that Doug, my thoughts are with you. I lost my father this fall and the time in the hospital slowly watching all hopes fade was the worst thing I've ever been through. I can imagine it's even worse when it's your significant other. Remember, you're not alone. If nothing else, if you need someone to talk to... someone to listen, I guess I speak for all of us when I say there's always someone here for that - day or night.
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Doug, my thoughts and prayers are with your wife, you and your family.
I'm wishing you are able to find the clarity and strength to cope with these difficult times.
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Doug, it's hard to find words of embrace when you deal with situations such as these. I wish you and your family the best, and pray that this all ends for the better.
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Thanks all, I'm overwhelmed by the response.
Just back from the hospital and nothing much has changed, except she looks more bruised than yesterday. Her anti-rejection drugs which I suspect were invented by the Nazi's in the concentration camps and haven't been improved much since, have, as one of their many side effects, reduced her skin to the strength of tissue paper. Everywhere they've touched her is purple-black and horror of horrors, they've liberally used elastoplast to secure all their paraphanalia. They obviously needed to move one needle and yanked a piece of plaster off, taking the skin with it and leaving a gaping, bleeding wound. To compound their error, they covered the wound with Opsite, a type of plastic skin that stays on until the wound underneath it heals. They may as well have amputated her arm, that stuff is never coming off.
I cannot believe that someone so innocent and big-hearted can be made to suffer so much, it's just so wrong! Every time I walk into the ward, I just lose it. I also never realised how much I've dedicated myself to taking care of her over the last few years, I got up this morning and walked through the house like a lost soul, realising there was absolutely nothing to do. I must make some plans to get a life when this is over.
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Wow... your strength is immense. I would never be able to handle such a thing.
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[QUOTE=Drift Illusion]Wow... your strength is immense. I would never be able to handle such a thing.[/QUOTE]
Just a regular guy caught in a bad place.
While trying to justify my existance here at home, cleaning up, tidying up, putting stuff away, I found my beautifully wrapped Christmas presents tonight, marked "Doug. With all my love. Terry". Oh my.............:(
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Theres nothing I can say that hasn't already been said.
You have to stay strong for her, the last thing she would want is for your life to collapse just because of her.
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Oh Doug,
It's really damn hard to see the screen when I read your posts. I well and truly feel what you're going through. I hate the quiet home just as much as you do.
My wife and I lost out 3 year old daughter back in February of 2004. We too had to decide when we wouldn't put her thru more transfusions, and when to just give oxygen and pain relieving drugs, and make her comfy with us and her family around. We knew that it was hard to make that call, but we knew that it was for the best.
It looks like you're up against the same wall.
You know what she wants, you've got 32 amazing years to remember. And as we've all said, we're here to support you. No matter what you have to do.
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I guess no words can truly give justice to the horrible situations you are in. I read the entire thread and I feel very sad... I really hope you and your wife will pass through this difficult situation... I'm really impressed by how strong you are. I couldn't pass through this if it happened to me. I honestly wish the best for you, your wife and your family, and I probably won't be able not to think about that... I hope you will keep us informed. As many people said before, we will all be here for you as soon as you will need to talk, or whatever you might want, there will be someone for you. Just consider UCP as a family you can rely on.
I am sorry to be so lost for words in such a awful situation...
Regards,
David.
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Like many have said on this thread, I can't express how much I feel for you and your family Doug. My very best wishes go out to you all. Be strong!!
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Best of wishes Doug. I will prey that you and your wife make it through this. God bless.