Page 1 of 4 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 48

Thread: good explanation of the cause of our financial problems

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Gods Country, USA
    Posts
    1,546

    good explanation of the cause of our financial problems

    Heidi is the proprietor of a bar in Detroit . In order to increase sales, she decides to allow her loyal customers - most of whom are unemployed alcoholics - to drink now but pay later.

    She keeps track of the drinks consumed on a ledger (thereby granting the customers loans). Word gets around about Heidi's drink now pay later marketing strategy and as a result, increasing numbers of customers flood into Heidi's bar and soon she has the largest sale volume for any bar in Detroit .

    By providing her customers' freedom from immediate payment demands, Heidi gets no resistance when she substantially increases her prices for wine and beer, the most consumed beverages. Her sales volume increases massively.

    A young and dynamic vice-president at the local bank recognizes these customer debts as valuable future assets and increases Heidi's borrowing limit. He sees no reason for undue concern since he has the debts of the alcoholics as collateral.

    At the bank's corporate headquarters, expert traders transform these customer loans into DRINKBONDS, ALKIBONDS and PUKEBONDS. These securities are then traded on security markets worldwide. Naive investors don't really understand the securities being sold to them as AAA secured bonds are really the debts of unemployed alcoholics. Nevertheless, their prices continuously climb, and the securities become the top-selling items for some of the nation's leading brokerage houses.

    One day, although the bond prices are still climbing, a risk manager at the bank (subsequently fired due his negativity), decides that the time has come to demand payment on the debts incurred by the drinkers at Heidi's bar.

    Heidi demands payment from her alcoholic patrons, but being unemployed, they cannot pay back their drinking debts. Therefore, Heidi cannot fulfill her loan obligations and claims bankruptcy.

    DRINKBOND and ALKIBOND drop in price by 90 %. PUKEBOND performs better, stabilizing in price after dropping by 80 %. The decreased bond asset value destroys the banks liquidity and prevents it from issuing new loans.

    The suppliers of Heidi's bar, having granted her generous payment extensions and having invested in the securities are faced with writing off her debt and losing over 80% on her bonds.

    Her wine supplier claims bankruptcy, her beer supplier is taken over by a competitor, who immediately closes the local plant and lays off 50 workers.

    The bank and brokerage houses are saved by the Government following dramatic round-the-clock negotiations by leaders from both political parties. The funds required for this bailout are obtained by a tax levied on employed middle-class non-drinkers.

    Finally an explanation in terms I can understand...Where's my beer!!
    A woman goes to the doctor to figure out why she is having breathing problems...The doctor tells her she is overweight. She says she wants a second opinion...the doctor says, "your ugly".

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    in a house
    Posts
    1,264
    this is more convoluded than the real thing imo...
    it was actually me who killed vasilli zaitsev, heinz thorwald, carlos hatchcock, and simo hayha

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Calgary AB
    Posts
    1,580
    Quote Originally Posted by blingbling View Post
    this is more convoluded than the real thing imo...
    i concur

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    NEW YORK
    Posts
    6,985
    Good story. But the real thing was never really hard to understand.
    John says:
    so i had to dump acid into the block tank today
    i'm afraid to fap
    cause i got it on my hands

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    in a house
    Posts
    1,264
    Quote Originally Posted by baddabang View Post
    Good story. But the real thing was never really hard to understand.
    ...after it happened
    it was actually me who killed vasilli zaitsev, heinz thorwald, carlos hatchcock, and simo hayha

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    True North
    Posts
    7,682
    Quote Originally Posted by blingbling View Post
    ...after it happened
    I wouldn't even say that. People saw it and turned a blind eye.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Location
    Rozenburg, Holland
    Posts
    27,328
    Quote Originally Posted by The_Canuck View Post
    I wouldn't even say that. People saw it and turned a blind eye.
    not blind, greedy is a much better word.
    "I find the whole business of religion profoundly interesting, but it does mystify me that otherwise intelligent people take it seriously." Douglas Adams

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    in a house
    Posts
    1,264
    what about blinded by greed?
    it was actually me who killed vasilli zaitsev, heinz thorwald, carlos hatchcock, and simo hayha

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    11,391
    Quote Originally Posted by roosterjuicer View Post
    The funds required for this bailout are obtained by a tax levied on employed middle-class non-drinkers.
    Try upper-class non-drinkers. Unless now the middle class starts at $250,000 per year.

    Remember, 95% of American's won't see a penny more in taxes? You have to pay for trillions in spending somehow, you can either let China own us completely, raise the taxes on the wealthy to such a point where they hide the majority of their income, or raise taxes on everyone. My guess is the last option will come true.
    Last edited by my porsche; 03-18-2009 at 07:36 PM.
    He came dancing across the water
    With his galleons and guns
    Looking for the new world
    In that palace in the sun
    On the shore lay Montezuma
    With his cocoa leaves and pearls

  10. #10
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Northern New Jersey
    Posts
    16,602
    Quote Originally Posted by my porsche View Post
    Try upper-class non-drinkers. Unless now the middle class starts at $250,000 per year.

    Remember, 95% of American's won't see a penny more in taxes? You have to pay for trillions in spending somehow, you can either let China own us completely, raise the taxes on the wealthy to such a point where they hide the majority of their income, or raise taxes on everyone. My guess is the last option will come true.
    I don't know why people fear China becoming larger than America. Your point about taxes I can understand (even though you're trying to knock Obama), granted you do realise that there may be little to no choice at this point due to the bailout money.
    Rockefella says:
    pat's sister is hawt
    David Fiset says:
    so is mine
    David Fiset says:
    do want

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    11,391
    Quote Originally Posted by Rockefella View Post
    I don't know why people fear China becoming larger than America. Your point about taxes I can understand (even though you're trying to knock Obama), granted you do realize that there may be little to no choice at this point due to the bailout money.
    No, I meant own as in the literal sense of ownership, not like "OMG L33t PWNZ0RZ" use of "own".

    More loans from China = they own even more of our debt = they own us.

    Minor knock on Obama there, yes, he made a huge deal about his tax policy which was completely unrealistic (I'm not sure if I mentioned that on here during the election) and now it's time to eat his words.

    Raise the top income bracket tax rate to some obscene amount, see how many people bother working overtime to put them into that bracket if they'll be taking home less than $0.50 on the dollar, it simply won't be worth their time. All my opinions of course, I know they differ dramatically from the general consensus here.
    He came dancing across the water
    With his galleons and guns
    Looking for the new world
    In that palace in the sun
    On the shore lay Montezuma
    With his cocoa leaves and pearls

  12. #12
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Northern New Jersey
    Posts
    16,602
    Quote Originally Posted by my porsche View Post
    Minor knock on Obama there, yes, he made a huge deal about his tax policy which was completely unrealistic (I'm not sure if I mentioned that on here during the election) and now it's time to eat his words.
    Like I wrote above, I think the economy is more than partially to blame for this tax increase and we may not have a choice. With the bailout and stimulus, money has to come from somewhere. So yes, he may eat his words but the way I read it came off as 'he lied to us' while I feel a different course had to be taken. Even if it involved going back on his campaign agenda.

    Raise the top income bracket tax rate to some obscene amount, see how many people bother working overtime to put them into that bracket if they'll be taking home less than $0.50 on the dollar, it simply won't be worth their time. All my opinions of course, I know they differ dramatically from the general consensus here.
    People making well into the six figures: 1. Usually don't rely on obscene overtime hours to eek them into such a bracket and 2. in my opinion can accept a tax increase with much more ease than say a lower and middle class laborer.
    Rockefella says:
    pat's sister is hawt
    David Fiset says:
    so is mine
    David Fiset says:
    do want

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Kyushu
    Posts
    6,039
    Quote Originally Posted by my porsche View Post
    Try upper-class non-drinkers. Unless now the middle class starts at $250,000 per year.
    thanks for takin' one for the team Colin.
    Honor. Courage. Commitment. Etcetera.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    421
    Some people have been living beyond their means.
    Should Comcast, which is buying NBC, have more motorsports coverage on VERSUS and now NBC? Does North America need a racing tv channel? Find the answer to that exact question on facebook.

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    nr Edinburgh, Whisky-soaked Scotland
    Posts
    27,775
    Quote Originally Posted by my porsche View Post
    Raise the top income bracket tax rate to some obscene amount, see how many people bother working overtime to put them into that bracket if they'll be taking home less than $0.50 on the dollar, it simply won't be worth their time.
    Well if sensible tax brackets are set then anyone entering the "high bracket" is earning a VERY good salary and has a VERY comfortable lifestyle --- so not a line worker doing overtime
    THat's one of the classic right-wing anti-socialism scare-mongering tactics, best not believe it 100% !!
    Agreed it's a "pain" to think that the top dollars being earned are getting taxed high, but generally the follow on benefits are worth it. Better schools, education, housing and healthcare for the vast majority so they DONT become a ghetto-living, thieving, vandalising, homeless, disenfranchised under class. And start earnign decent income and adding their own income to the wealth and social capital of the city/state/country enabling the high end tax bracket to be moved higher -- win-win

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •