Karrmann's getting a new CPU!

[Cotterik]

5$ says he manages to screw it all up in the next 10 months.

make it 10$ and 2 months

[kko]

I bet $10 he trys to modify his computer "by himself" and causes it to spontaniously explode and implode at the same time.

[Coventrysucks]

Top tips for computer users:

11. To protect your investment in that new DVD-/+RW, soak five or six cotton balls in alcohol (the higher the proof the better), place them in the tray and close it then hit the eject button to open it back up. Do this several times. Don't worry if you lose one of the cotton balls, just replace it with a freshly soaked one.

10. Over time, sound cards can get clogged up and start sounding muddy. It's a good idea to periodically go into the sound control panel and turn all the volume sliders to maximum. Don't forget turn the speaker volume to max, as well.

9. Computer cases, like aquariums, can become dirty and develop a layer of scum on their inside. To keep your computer scum-free, it is a good idea to buy a few snails from the local pet store and place them inside.

8. Floppy disks are meant to be floppy, the floppier they are the better they work. You should, on a regular basis, bend your floppies back and forth several times to keep them from stiffening up.

7. Every now and then check for loose hardware. Turn your PC on then pick it up and shake it as hard as possible. If something wasn't installed tight enough, it will have shaken loose and and you'll be able to hear the rattle. Dropping the PC from a few feet onto the desk surface will accomplish the same results.

6. If your computer is locking up, it's because it's tired and sleepy. Pour some fresh-brewed coffee on the motherboard to wake it up.

5. Keep that 15,000 rpm SCSI drive free of contaminants and running smoothly by squirting lighter fluid on it once it's reached operating temperature.

4. If you've made unwanted changes to a document or spreadsheet, just use the handy "reset" button to reverse the changes.

3. When using a microphone and speakers, place them as close to one another as possible to achieve the maximum desired effect.

2. Make your own wireless devices. All you need to do is install the recommended wireless card then you can cut the wires off your keyboard and mouse with a regular pair of scissors.

1. If you currently have a glass top desk for your computer desk and you're thinking of getting an optical mouse, be aware that the mouse will not work correctly on the glass top desk. You will need to paint the bottom of the mouse a solid color. Black works best.

These tips aren't mine. If you follow them don't blame me; blame yourself for not using your brain.

[baddabang]

Top tips for computer users:



These tips aren't mine. If you follow them don't blame me; blame yourself for not using your brain.

LMAO thats great haha Snails

[d-quik]

...um...can't believe cov had to put that warning on

[SPHFerrari]

coevntry, careful, he may just do these things.

[Wolf03]

That's the whole point. Shush.
Putting coffee on the motherboard always wakes her up and I swear I get the best performance out of her when I give her a little bit of coffee each time I want to start her up.

[SlickHolden]

because we want techincal suport and besides we want a finacing program, cause i didn't pick out the PC, my mom did.

Mate you never let the women pick the PC

I have had my PC 3 years now and before that didn't have any knowledge of them. 3 years down the track i learnt everything myself cause i was sick to death of asking people for help cause i felt they weren't helpful. So for the last 18 months i have been on my own. And in that time i have learnt to overclock, How to Network, Format Reinstall windows and find basic problems and fix them. I built this PC to what it is today all by myself and all along the way i got shit from so called no it all PC experts who wouldn't give me the time of day when i really needed help.
Like Sticking a Mobile CPU in a desktop they AMD said it can't be done. The guy who made my first PC told me it's dangerous but wouldn't help. So when 4 days after i installed the CPU and it shutdown one day what do you think i copped nothing but shit (This is what makes people learn).
I found the problem it was faulty ram not the CPU and had it replaced and all is perfect now for over a year If i can do that at my age you should be placed well to be the next bill gates I know you love Microsoft that much
And if you don't know something ask on a PC Forum they are great.

[Karrmann]

5$ says he manages to screw it all up in the next 10 months.

dude I know how to work a CPU.

oh wait, there's this

FATAL ERROR!?!?!?! WHAT!?!?

no really, it was my brother who screwed up the CPU, he messed with the wrong thing, I had nothing to to with it.

[Wouter Melissen]

How can you screw a CPU, other than by fiddling with very advanced settings?

[johnnynumfiv]

Its called a freaking computer Karrmann, not a cpu!

[Wolf03]

YOU KNOW, THREE PEOPLE SAY THE SAME THING, YET HE CAN'T GET it THROUGH THAT PUNNY BRAIN!

[Matt]

More proof of how stupid this guy is...
Since I like computers and take them seriously, it's pathetic and insulting that he calls the whole computer a CPU, which is just the Central Processing Unit.
And yes custom-building a computer is much easier and cheaper. You just buy the components needed. For example, I just upgraded my computer but the case is old and one would asume the computer is crap until they see the inside components. The only things I needed to upgrade were the motherboard, CPU, memory and power source and overall it did come cheaper because I already had a good video card, sound card, network card, speakers, monitor, etc.
Plus, by buying from those companies, you don't necessarly get the best quality. Usually, they have crappy video cards, motherboards and memory.

EDIT: Technical support? What you're gonna call them because suddenly the computer doesn't turn on, only to find out that the guy told you to check that the power cord is plugged but you never bothered to check?

The truth is that most corporations choose to purchase computers from Dell or another such company because of the technical support. It's much easier to have one place to go for support instead of 5 because you bought each of the components from different companies. I used to build my own computers and I used to build computers for others. Until I started working for a company that purchased Dell computers. The prices were great, the support is fantastic and, in fact, I never had a single Dell computer fail. The only part I ever had to replace was a secondary power supply in a 5-year-old server. Still under warranty. Shipped in 4 hours. You can't get that from a company just selling video cards. Or motherboards. Or memory. Or anything like that. They simply don't have the infrastructure or necessity to have such a massive support system. I will never build my own computer again.

[Matt]

Its called a freaking computer Karrmann, not a cpu!

CPU is not an uncommon term for the whole box itself. Sorry you're being so pedantic.

[Karrmann]

hmmm, can't spell puny, lame flame alert.

jeez man, my brother ****ed up my computer, I had nothing to do with it, so just send my bro flame emails and stop flaming me ok?