Wellsince the automotive idiot section si gone ill just makemy own Ive got afew sotires to tell and ive onlybeen at the bmw dealer for 2 weeks
Well first one i was washing the lot and i was washing a new 316ti (i think it was) and it was on rampsso i climbed up holding onto the backof the bonnet and put suds on it with my sponge and on my way down my soapy fingers gotcaught between the bonnet and the car itself. Soim cursing and swearing and then i notice a citome was behing me so i stop force a smile and ask if she wants help andwhen she says no the snob walks off while im obviously stuck so when she walks off i reef my fingers out and swear and curse and when she walks back i the used the sponge again and force another smile whilethere is blood going on the spounge and she walks off. (always be polite tocuustomers)
Anmd the next one i was detailing a dark blue 5 series and i look at my boss and ask what the M 1 2 3 buttons on the door do. Heignores me and does everyonme rember the movie dennis the menace? thelittle 6 year oldand when hes faced with a button h has topress it well add 12 years to that and put him in BMW overalls i pressed the buttonmarked M...nothing happened so i press 1 and then all of a sudden the seat moved and imsaushed against the stearing wheel...it was the memory forthe seat positions and it moved it to our little asian salemans seating position (hes onlylike 5' nothing) soi try to reach out for the button and i couldent reach it and moving anymore ment sounding off the horn soi quckly rach down for the 3 button and BEEEEEEEP and it moves back to the 6'4salemans position we have and the boss come upto me "what the F^&* are you doing?" and i respond by going oh i hit the horn too hard while adding finish and i grab a rag and holdit up and he walks off shakeing his head and i look to the rag i grabbed and it was my chemmoi and not my interior rag
And last but not least iwas detialing a brand new black5 series and there was a largeclackbutton on the dash i was putting finish on and i hitit too ahrd and the littlescreenon the dash lit up and said scanning so imsitting there going ohhhh shitand allof a sudden the car stratedshakeing i turned the radioon and the mechanic that fixed it had it blaring it was on classical music and i swear if i had any fillings they wouldof rattled out and the big boss comes around and i scream "how do you turn it off?" and allhes doing islaughing while im hitting every button there was and he reached in hit te origonalbutton i hit and walked off laughing whilemy ears were ringing i was shouting for a good few hours after that.
And then there was the classic about the old detailer who used degreser on a 7 seriesinstead of leather treatment...i stopped wondering why he wanst with us after that. And a customer of greek decsent who parked her car in front of the mechanics entrence and one of the mechanics pipes up"you cant bloody park there" and one of the salemen comes out to defuse the situation "im sorry madam youcant actuallypark you car there thats the work shop" she hand him the keys and says "Wellyou must be the valet i was waiting foryou to come out" the salesman takeing obvious offence to that smiled and nodded and she went inside the show room and he threw the keys to the mechanics and simply said "have fun!" and stormed off...last i saw 2 got and and shouted out "anybody want to go upthe mountain!?!"