Funny Jokes ... WARNING: may offend

[Matra et Alpine]

An elderly couple was sitting together, watching their favourite Saturday night TV program.

During one of those commercial breaks, the husband asked his wife: "Whatever happened to our sexual relations?"

After a long thoughtful silence, the wife, during the next commercial break, replied: "You know, I don't really know--I don't even think we got a Christmas card from them this year."

[Ferrer]

That made me laugh.



More here.

[Matra et Alpine]

Thanks Ferrer, a GREAT find. Didn't know his sketches were available.

[csl177]

Those Star Trek mashups were great! And Brockbank was a genius... my favorite R&T cartoonist along with Stan Mott.

If this one's been posted before, my apologies. A classic: [ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2OpuuAa7gdE&feature=related[/ame]

[Matra et Alpine]

A Greek and a Scotsman were sitting in a Starbuck's cafe discussing who had the superior culture.

Over triple lattes the Greek guy says, 'Well, we Greeks built the Parthenon,' arching his eyebrows.

The Scotsman then replies, 'Well... it was the Scots that discovered the Summer and Winter Solstices.'

The Greek retorts, 'We Greeks gave birth to advanced mathematics.'

The Scotsman, nodding in agreement, says, 'Scots were the ones who built the first timepieces and calendars.'

And so on until the Greek comes up with what he thinks will end the discussion.
With a flourish of finality he says, 'The Greeks were the ones who invented sex!'

The Scotsman replies, 'Aye, that is true, but it was we Scots who introduced it to the women'

[clutch-monkey]

quotes from post of the year thread in other forum:

"Ford: They circled the problem" is right, however "Nissan: They tried to circle the problem, but it was too big" also fits

and;

just looking at the spring rates (s13), they look like they are about the same as the stock spring rates, really soft. If they happen to be matched to the dampers, then that can only mean they are meant for bitch driving around smooth roads and carparks - that is, they arent designed to take much punishment at all.

Even the pot holes on george street will **** these up

would rather drive on a set of rubber dildo's tbh

Ill supply the dildo's Viet...

I wanna see this.

you can keep using the dildo's since i dont want my 180 to handle like a honda

- gay all round

[LeonOfTheDead]

[ame=http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=120921191]Worst possible "date" ever...I don't even... FML (serios) - Bodybuilding.com Forums[/ame]

the name of the forum is funny enough, but there is more...

[NSXType-R]

Worst possible "date" ever...I don't even... FML (serios) - Bodybuilding.com Forums

the name of the forum is funny enough, but there is more...

What normal person needs a pee bottle...?

I guess the steroids that they use make it so that they pee a lot.

And anyway, if he had gone take a crap earlier, he wouldn't have gotten himself into so much trouble.

[cmcpokey]

truly an example of why some people don't need to reproduce.

[IBrake4Rainbows]

Freudian drawings. Epic Douchebag.

Nice.

[Matra et Alpine]

Red Neck Christmas scene

[clutch-monkey]

that is awesome. i even have a patio roof like that..

[Matra et Alpine]

^^^^^^ yea but do they do Christmas Kangaroo lights ? Has to be authentic ocker

[whiteballz]

ocker? thats too phonically correct.

occa.

[pimento]

The Oxley Creek Catchment Association? Crickey.. Ocker is fine. Streuth, all our grouse slang is bleedin' phoenetic correct anyway..