PC gamers occasionally dabble into console gaming, but we inevitably return to our beloved machines, disappointed. They're just so limited: conveniently crippled by the manufacturers, forcing you to spend money when you shouldn't need to, and it's not like they have enough exlusive games to make them worth the cash in the first place. So, we thought we'd save you a bit of money, and explain as clearly as possible why your next console should be a PC.
1. They go under the TV
First of all: PCs don't belong under the desk or in the office. Flat form and silent shuttle PCs are perfect for sliding into a pretty TV shelf. You can hook them up to almost all HDTVs via the VGA or DVI ports, and you can route the sound through your TV, or any decent surround sound receiver via optical outs. Even the Windows desktop looks pretty spiffing at a grand 32" across, never mind the rolling landscapes of Stalker or Armed Assault.
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2. The games are more exciting
Sorry console chums, but we're fed up with playing the same game at a higher resolution. It's hard not to chuckle slightly when the big PS3 launch titles are a high-resolution version of Motorcross Madness (Motorstorm), and a ropy FPS (Resistance) that's hardly fit to wipe the spittle from Gordon Freeman's beard. Want to know why launch games are rubbish? It's because it takes years of experience for developers to get the best out of a machine. PS3 developers have six months' experience, at best. PC developers have been working with their chosen machine for decades, and know how to get the best out of it.
3. We're not being charged to relive our past
The Xbox Live Arcade and PlayStation Network Initiative were sold to gamers as a route for developers and publishers to experiment with fresh new game ideas. Ha. What's actually happened is that the entire industry has engaged in a massive shovelware exercise: repackaging their back catalogues and charging gamers extortionate sums for the privilege of playing. The big hitters on Xbox Live? Doom, Castlevania, Worms, Pac Man and Street Fighter. On the Wii, Nintendo really do want you to pay for Super Mario, again, Zelda, again, Mario Kart, again, and F-Zero, again. Ignore the fact that the PC can emulate all these games for a fraction of the cost. Instead concentrate on the fact that the true home of independent games is the PC. This week we've been messing about in Defcon (Nuclear War!), The Shivah (an adventure game in which you play a Rabbi investigating a murder) and Peggle (Pachinko, but brilliant) - all games released outside the traditional games industry, all far better than any of the reheated 'classics' the console manufacturers charge you for.
4. Just say no to nickle and diming
Do you really want to let the console manufacturers charge £4.25 for three re-heated Guitar Hero songs? You're really that ready to be ripped off? It's now clear that to put a console under your telly is to put a Microsoft or Sony authorised vending machine in the front and centre of your living room. Sod that. The PC isn't a vending machine: it's a gateway to a community of creators that upload their best work for free. From new maps and mods, to total conversions, to entirely new games, the PC hosts the widest selection of free games on the planet. There is no end to the fun.
5. It's not just about the mouse and keyboard.
Here's the really funny part. Those who rally against the PC complain that the mouse and keyboard are unsuitable for gaming. They're wrong of course, but it's not like PCs are limited to playing with that. The PC supports all of the controllers available for consoles right now: you can plug a 360 or PS3 controller into the PC, and you can even hook up the Wii remote if you're so inclined. The choice is yours.
6. It's a proper media centre
Big news! The Xbox 360 can now play MPEG-4 up to 8Mbps, H.264 up to 15Mbps, and PlaysForSure WMV videos. And the Wii and PS3 can pick up Virgin Radio streams. Umm. Great? The PC can play every media format, ever, and stream all the radio stations in the world, ever. All you need is a copy of the free VLC player. Just drag and drop and enjoy your favourite media without worrying about having to encode, re-encode or transcode. Just double click and enjoy.
7. All the games are coming, anyway.
We're sorry to break it to you if you've shelled out thousands of pounds for a complete collection of consoles, but the era of platform exclusives is over. You're not going to need a 360 and a PS3 in your house. The mainstream big budget games are far too expensive to be limited to a single platform. If a third-party developer announces a game, you can assume it's going to appear on the PC. They might come a few months later, but the definitive version of all the games, complete with technical improvements and added content, will definitely arrive on the PC in a few short months.
8. You can play the future today.
Sony and Microsoft's next big play is to win the hearts of gamers through user-created content. The theory goes that if you give simple development tools to gamers, they can fill in your game worlds with new levels, new stories, maybe even new chapters. That might be great in theory for console gamers, but it's been a reality on the PC for years now. Want to see if Sony's Little Big Planet (a kind of build your own platform game) is going to work? Try TrackMania. Want to see how Halo 3's new in-game replay tools will survive contact with players? Google for Counter-Strike replay videos.
9. True backward compatibility.
Hilariously, the UK PS3's can't play a good proportion of PS2 games. Or PS1 games for that matter. The Xbox 360 is in a similar boat: in both cases games that are meant to be backwards compatible crash or suffer from graphical or sound glitches. The PC is permanently backwards compatible. You have to work very hard indeed to find a game that doesn't work on Windows, and chances are, running it through a brilliant program called Dosbox will fix the problem. Compare that with the Xbox 360, where there a recognised bugs for when playing pretty much all the major Xbox titles, and the PS3 which manages to make PS2 games look even jaggier.
10. We've got the best looking games.
Cervat Yerli is the man in charge of developing Crysis, by far the best looking game in development right now. Here's what he thinks: in an interview with our sister magazine, Edge, he said, "the next-generation consoles can't handle our game."